i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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