We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Randomize
