This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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