And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
