You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
No subtext here. People are naked.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Randomize
