All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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