Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize