I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
