Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Randomize
