ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize