I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
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