Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
