meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
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