sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
this just has baby written all over it
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Randomize