I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
