Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
