Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
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