So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize