that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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