you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
