guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize