Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Drake has all the answers
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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