Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
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