What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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