All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Randomize
