The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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