And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
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