Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Randomize