Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Randomize
