i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Randomize
