i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize