i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
barbara walters just said penis...
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
