i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
this will be a night to untag.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Randomize
