so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize