just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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