I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
