Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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