You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
