it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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