Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
