If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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