Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
