doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
