Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize