Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
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