The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
