Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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