No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
The uberlube is also flammable
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
