Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize