I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
Randomize
