Sorry, I don't speak sober.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
Hippo gnu deer
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
