this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize